As a runner I know what it means to push myself. To not give in when it starts to feel uncomfortable. Or impossible. To keep going when I think I need to stop.
As a runner I know that I use my body the most when I feel stressed. Overwhelmed. Or sad. Yes. Those are the days when I run hard. And fast. To outrun my mind. To outrun everything that feels overwhelming. And hurts my heart.
As a runner when I am running my favorite trail. In the zone. With obvious signs of spring everywhere. The smell of fresh-cut grass in the air. And 70 degree weather with a slight breeze. I feel invincible. Unstoppable. Like a boss. Hardcore. Powerful. Determined. Relentless. And superhuman. That mindset stays with me off the trail. But only for a little while. And then it’s time to go back to having an ordinary human mindset.
But sometimes an ordinary human mindset has comfort zones. Limits. And restrictions. That make me feel unsure. Doubtful. Anxious. Indecisive. And I have come up with so many good reasons to stay where I am. Yes. Because staying where I am is where things feel comfortable.
But staying where I am, will not get me to where I want to go. Or make me a better version of myself.
Earlier in the week I mentioned I would be challenged to leave my comfort zone. Physically. I knew this going because last Saturday, I tested the waters. Of my own outdated mindset. And my outdated comfort zone.
I have no idea how I went back there. But I am taking about the mindset of dealing with a heart virus and not knowing if I will ever run again. And when I was able to run again, the mindset where I didn’t know if I would make it back home. So I made sure a fire department was somewhere along my route. Or at least close by. And you see. Somewhere along the way in the past months since my last injury. Without even noticing, I allowed myself to fall back into having an outdated mindset. Until this last week, I decided to run a new trail. And without even noticing I ended up nearly 6 miles away from the nearest fire department. Which doesn’t seem like much. Unless you’re in the middle of nowhere. With an outdated mindset. And an outdated comfort zone. At first I panicked. I considered calling someone to come get me. But it wasn’t that easy. Someone couldn’t just come get me. I was in the middle of nowhere. Being in the middle of nowhere meant I would have to be rescued. By the fire department. And who wants to admit that having to be rescued could even be a possibility. Certainly not me.
So I stopped for a series of moments and took a deep breath. Another. And another. Until I remembered I am not that person anymore. With an outdated mindset. That needs to be rescued. I am not the person with a comfort zone who doesn’t know if she will make it home. And I am certainly not the person who needs a f-ing fire department along the route when she goes for a run. So I wiped away my tears, blew my nose on my shirt and headed towards home. And I left my outdated mindset and comfort zone behind. Where is belongs.
You see, I am an ordinary human. Yes. But I don’t have to have an ordinary mindset. Yes. I had an injury last year. That left me afraid I wouldn’t make a comeback. Without even realizing it I took a step back. instead of forward. But my injury is healed. I can not be afraid. Because my injury left me stronger. I know better. I can dream big. I can think positive. Be hopeful. And not doubt what I am capable of. But I have to be mindful of what I am thinking. I have to be mindful of when I feel comfortable with running. Or comfortable with anything else in my life. Because if I am feeling comfortable, I am holding myself back. I am not giving enough. I am not pushing the limits. And I am certainly not allowing my running to get me to where I need to go. To be a better version of myself. And to get to everything I see in my dreams.
Stay tuned, this runner isn’t done with leaving comfort zones for this week. April’s goals. Sharing hearts. Or thoughts.
Have you ever had an outdated comfort zone?
What’s for dinner? We are having tacos, which is everyone’s favorite meal!
Until next time, always be true to yourself and think like a boss!